Caddies share their biggest on-course pet peeves

pet peeves
Caddies have plenty of pet peeves. We recently asked our caddie followers on Twitter to identify those things on the course that irk them most. Credit: Thomas J. Russo-USA TODAY Sports

It was an innocent question we tossed out to our Twitter followers a couple of weeks back: what are your biggest on-course pet peeves?

And, boy, did it hit a nerve! OK… maybe the question wasn’t “that innocent.” We were hoping for a response and we got it.

It was almost like on Seinfeld when it was Frank Costanza’s turn to air his grievances on Festivus:

Without further adieu, here are our favorite responses from our followers…

“Iron covers. No better indication of poor play and lousy tip.” — @vedderkj

PGA Tour caddie Joe Etter was a fan of the iron cover mention and added this: “100%. Pair those with plastic tubes and you might as well just go home.”

RELATED: The definitive guide to tipping a caddie | 23 hilarious caddie one-liners

“Range finder battery dying on 2 tee.” — @johnlewman1yah1

“Hitting a 12 footer 12 feet by the hole and telling you it didn’t break.” — @Lashstronaut

“Players who repeatedly hand me their trash to throw away.” — @trestice_hs

“Leaving the club resting on the bag. Put that shit back in.” — @Sjstaley1174

“Every time I hear ‘really?’ I want to say ‘no, actually I am giving you bad information in hopes of making less money today.'” — @k_kcgonzo25

“Amateur golfers who use tour bags that have rain gear (on a sunny day), enough balls to fill a range bucket, and head covers on all their clubs.” — @Aytesball

“Being second-guessed by a guest late in a round after giving great reads and excellent yardage, slow players and cheap players.” — @derbycaddy

“Caddies wearing golf shoes.” — @HerbieChamplin1

“A 25 handicap with 3W out of rough.” — @GolfTilDeath

“Giving the correct read and the player making a bad stroke and blaming it on the read.” — @Ryanman777

“1. Cheapskates. Most places you play that require caddies cost good money. So tip properly; 2. Iron covers; 3. The guy in the group who wants to play the back tees and thinks the other 3 guys who can’t play as well as him should accommodate him; 4. Staff bags with 6 dozen balls; 5. People who hold their hand out 2 seconds after they tossed you their golf ball to clean.” — @Kygolfnews

bunker
Golfers and fellow caddies appreciate a properly raked bunker. Credit: Jasen Vinlove-USA TODAY Sports

“Players pretending to be hurt cause they’re playing bad.” — @HerbieChamplin1

“Players who walk into the bunker one way and then exit thru the opposite side or end they entered.” — @GottaAskKay

“People hitting at the same time and expecting to know where both balls went.” — @TheJoeyMcCusker

“People using a putter to get the ball out of the hole.” — @rya526

“Guys that are worth millions yet want to look 5 minutes for their ball 8 clicks up a mountain.” — @7outshooter

“On pro-am day I’ll give the number and the amateur players get the laser and shoot the pin saying, ‘Oh no… It’s less or more on my range finder.'” — @jorgeo23

“Blaming the caddie for poor shot execution.” — @green_hitter

“Taking 5 minutes to read an 80-foot putt. Literally read it from every angle.” — @BIsaac17

“Men jingling change in their pocket while my player is over the ball.” — @onceacaddy

“Always loved the guy who hit his driver consistently 180 all day and he’d play a par 4 that’s 420, ‘What do I have in?’ ‘240.’ ‘That to the pin?'” — @eghsbrock

READ: How I became a PGA Tour caddie | Unwritten rules to caddying

“… and don’t forget that at 240 back, you must wait for the green to clear before hitting your 50-yard worm burner.” — @Indlake

“Loading me up with your beers… Bro, I’m not your bartender.” — @LooperNation

“Players that are so cheap they don’t take caddies, but ask the caddie every question under the sun then run away after the round.” — @MJ_Doran

“Players who dig feet in and don’t smooth out footprints.” — @lippardtom

“Was slow play! Also, a complete lack of any shelter during delays!” — @danegolf1960

“The new pin rule and players who can’t decide whether they want it in or out and then change their minds throughout the round.” — @NateT215

“Don’t tell me you’re a 4 handicap when you’re clearly a 24.” — @tsrfarr

“Golfers not pulling a club after approach shot misses the green when they know damn well which wedge they are going to use to chip on.” — @SmirKkDiggler

“Player pulling the flagstick and tossing it on the green.” — @JoshRawn

“Holding the umbrella. No other correct answer.” — @weisstho1800

“Player: ‘You sure??’ Me in my head: ‘No, I make my living lying.’; Player from 250+ in the rough: Pulls 3W Me: ‘Rough is thick. Probably want to hit this into the fairway and restart the process. (Handing him the grip side of a SW).’ Player: ‘No, I’ll stick with the 3W.'” — @TheeGreenMoose

“Fellow player hits it in shit. We start to look. ‘What ball ya playin’?’ ‘I don’t know. It’s either a Titleist 2 or 3, or an old Callaway. But maybe not.'” — @GolfTilDeath

Tour staff bag
Tour staff bags. Leave them to the pros, people. Credit: Steve Flynn-USA TODAY Sports

“‘It didn’t break.’ Well, sir, you hit it 15 feet by the hole so…” — @RyanAHammond

“The other caddie in the group being drunk or lazy.” — @oc_erit

“Members trying to rake their own bunkers and doing an awful job.” — @lanceaaffl

“When bags become storage facilities and not golf bags.” — @TC4Ireland

“Slow play by amateurs who act like every putt is to win the Masters.” — @oconnor_dick

“Singles on Saturdays who expect to play through the pack. Get some golf friends, buddy.” — @N0RMANCH0MSKY

“My biggest peeves: cherry flavor smelling cigars and the old standoff — ‘come find me the clubhouse’; or, ‘I’ll met up with you in the pro shop’ and then ditch! Albeit that was some years ago.” — @Nightrain_layne

“When a player doesn’t grab a club for his/her next shot… And I’m not a mindreader. If you want me to show you a line on the green, ask.” — @SamediBenjamin

“Rain gear. In the desert.” — @SkateLaceBite

“Player rummaging through their bag when another player is preparing to hit a shot.” — @realBuckyGator

“Worst golfer in the group being the slowest golfer in the group.” — @ToddMcKee11

“When the player blows it by 20 feet and says with a straight face, ‘that ball didn’t move.’ GTFOH.” — @305_steve

“Rushed rake jobs and no divot replacement.” — @ALanoII

“Time people take on greens or just taking too much time! #paceofplay: — @dbz99

“Putting two rakes next to each other when leaving a bunker.” — @Caddiedawg

“Me making mistakes.” — @SkipperOfTheWay

“Guys giving me their club, not looking as they walk away and their arms drop, making it even more out of reach.” — @SkipperOfTheWay

“Hacks who think they are gonna score on courses that have held multiple majors.” — @derek4real29

“When a guest comes and plays and has to make every single putt even from one inch. Then when 8 in the fairway. Take break this hole.” — @laphillyfan

COMMENTS

  1. The correct comeback to those audibly complaining the putt they hit way past the hole didn’t move; “Bullets don’t break”

  2. No repairing deviots on the putting greens. Everyone in groups should repair one. Last but not lease dont say that’s good right when you are putting awful, so you can brag about a good round.

  3. In a pro-am we start at 11 by 12 my pro hits 7i full 187..am gets up pulls same,I go wadda u doin with that? Trust me 5i the one, unbelievable he switch’s… Swish…wins 2 sea/doos and trailer not so much as a 🍺👎😕

  4. One guy way left, the other way right. One player has to volunteer to grab a club or their bag.

    My favorite line to lighten the mood in that situation: “Hey guys, did you hear they are building a Home Depot near here? Yeah right between your 2 drives.”

  5. The last thing a caddie ever wants to hear….”Is there an ATM in the clubhouse?” No!

    Fortunately next question was do you have Venmo? Yes….Third time I have used it this year at the club.

  6. Having a group and then there is group pro, that after you have give them the information the others ask the group self proclaimed pro for advice and he is wrong on the advice (normally they have not been at that facility before but HE KNOWS ALL THE GOLF IN THE WORLD) and you get an inside chuckle when you see their shots so off line because they listened to the GUY that knows all the golf!! SMH!

  7. Players always ask on the range ‘how long you been here? ‘

    15 years.

    Same player on 11 green, ‘so you think this goes left?’

    No sir, I don’t THINK sh!t.

  8. Umbrellas in the bag on a sunny day; old head covers too big for the club and keep falling off; the double strap bag on the left shoulder;

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